World’s Best Bear, 2023
Winner
That Vintage Bear
How They Got Here
We have no idea how That Vintage Bear got here; we have no idea how That Vintage Bear did it. This is one of the great upsets of all-time. Never would any of the great World Famous Sweet Livin’ Productions World’s Best Bear Poll prognosticators ever predicted this. In fact, none did. But in a story that is right out of an (unread) Hollywood script (never picked up by any studio), That Vintage Bear came out of literal obscurity to best a field of highly-touted bears previously better known and previously allegedly “better.” But such incorrect allegations can now stop in 2024 (at least when discussing bear greatness in 2023), for That Vintage Bear proved all the doubters wrong.
Where They Came From
We have no idea where That Vintage Bear came from. Naturally, the very best internet sleuths, clock-riding government intelligence agents, and up-and-coming investigative journalists will be all over this one—if there is any hope for this world’s integrity in 2024. That’s a big if, of course. But what happens with That Vintage Bear will be a barometer for 2024.
What’s Next For Them
This is also shrouded in great mystery. With not knowing where That Vintage Bear came from, it is difficult to know where That Vintage Bear will go. Obviously, That Vintage Bear will enjoy the normal perks of winning the World Famous Sweet Livin’ Productions World’s Best Bear Poll. But that goes without saying. Yet, sometimes it feels good to say. So we said it. And you should too when you’re feeling low—or when you’re feeling good and simply want to feel better. Or when you are having a difficult time expressing your love to someone, you can just say that instead: “That Vintage Bear will enjoy the normal perks of winning the World Famous Sweet Livin’ Productions World’s Best Bear Poll.“ They may be confused by that statement of love, but sometimes love is confusing. #SometimesLoveIsConfusing
